As I write this, I’m knee deep in prep for Summer Kraken, a baroque gaming retreat in the German wilderness. As usual, I’m bringing a new Feng Shui one-shot, and so I thought I’d release this – from last summer’s convention. As usual, it’s written up in a playable-for-me sense – your mileage may vary!

If you want to get hold of Feng Shui 2, the best place to start is Atlas Games. If you’re curious to see how it plays in action, you can watch me run it for (among other gaming luminaries) Robin Laws, the game’s designer, on Unconventional GMs – a tight hour and a half of a different one-shot, to feature soon! Check out the other Feng Shui 2 one-shots I’ve posted here, too.

If you want this one-shot in .pdf form, you can get it from my Patreon feed – of which:

While you’re reading this, I should tell you about my Patreon. Patrons get access to content 7 days before they hit this site, the chance to request articles or content, and the chance to play in one-shot games, for a very reasonable backer level of £2 per month. If you like what you read, want to support the blog, and have the funds for it, please consider supporting here. Telling people about the blog, and sharing links/retweeting is much appreciated also – thanks!

Autumn Flute, ambitious priest of Ming I, the lord of the Darkness Pagoda, seeks any means necessary to climb the greasy pole of the Netherworld and garner some safety. Human sacrifices are de rigeur in Ming I’s gloomy lands, but the sacrifice – and subsequent eating – of a powerful sorcerer, bound to a legendary Feng Shui site on Earth, is much more likely to win the ears of his master.

Earth is a long way from the Netherworld, so he’s gathered the assistance of Capuchinfellow Hawke, a similarly ambitious cyborg monkey, who’s converted the Darkness Pagoda’s warehouse in Kowloon into a chop-shop making super-cars, and stealing helicopters. 

Nana Lo, the erstwhile sorcerer, is about to celebrate her retirement – with a grand festival at the top of a Central District skyscraper – and with many bowls of her legendary knife-cut noodles, when Autumn Flute and the Ape-Choppers attack! Luckily, our heroes happen to be celebrating with them – can they step in and rescue Nana Lo?

Scene 1 – Opening

Hong Kong’s Central District is a maze of skyscrapers, with hard-nosed men in suits riding up and down their multi-floored lifts. The PCs have been invited to the food festival at the Penthouse on the top of Shinji Corporation – they know that Nana Lo will be there, and she has been a legendary sorcerer and mentor to them for several years. Different PCs may have different opinions as to whether she is a sorcerer, or just a really well-connected woman who makes excellent noodles.

• Go around the party and ask them to each describe one of the street food stands, and put them – and their proprietors – on index cards as a sort of ‘map’
• Add Nana Lo’s – a steaming pot of noodles overseen by a venerable chef, knives flashing, and a pair of similarly ancient assistants

Suddenly, a helicopter looms up against the skyscraper – and the PCs can just about make out the pilot – is that a monkey? – before the whole floor is caked in darkness. Gunshots fire out, and screams – and the splash of noodles being dropped!

As the gloom clears, many of the corporate suits appear to have changed sides, and are shooting at the assembled street food carts – and a pair of helicopters strafe the floor with machine gun fire.

Foe	S1	S2	S3	S4
Spring Trumpet	13	12	12	12
Midnight Viol	10	9	11	12
A-A Macaque	8	8	9	10
B-B Baboon	7	11	11	9
MOOKS	6	6	6	9

10 Darkness Pagoda Goons (mooks)

Martial Arts 8/Guns 8 / Def 13 / Speed 5 / Damage 10 (Glock), 7 (unarmed)

Spring Trumpet, Darkness Pagoda Giang Hu (FF)

Martial Arts 14 / Def 13 / Tou 5 / Spd 7 / Sword 10

Prodigious Leap – spend 1 shot to leap up to 14 feet in any direction

Stocky and wields a weird square-topped obsidian sword, mostly roars at people

Midnight Viol, Darkness Pagoda Sub-Priest (FF)

Sorcery 13 / Def 13 / Tou 5 / Spd 7 / Tendrils of darkness 10

Teleport – can move to ranged distance instantly

Constantly taunts the heroes with clues as to their plan – “soon the netherworld will know of our power, with the aid of our ape-friends”

Ack-Ack Macaque, helicopter-pilot ape (FF)

Guns 12 / Def 12 / You 6 / Spd 6 / Machinegun 10

Literally flying – need a reason to be able to attack directly

Once impaired, will attempt to flee

Sunglasses, brightly coloured macaque face, cackles

Boom-Boom Baboon, helicopter-pilot ape (FF)

Guns 12 / Def 12 / You 6 / Spd 6 / Machinegun 10

Literally flying – need a reason to be able to attack directly

Once impaired, will attempt to flee

Flight cap, headphones, silent

Once the chi gloom clears, it is obvious that everyone is largely OK – except that Nana Lo has vanished, along with her cabal. Magically sensitive PCs note that Nana’s magical noodle pot, which is itself capable of holding a Feng Shui site, has gone too – they need to get her back!

Surviving from her cabal is Auntie Wu, a venerable lady who reveals that Nana Lo’s legendary knife-cut noodles hold feng shui power – if the pot isn’t cooked in for 24 hours, the feng shui site will fall! She is a formidable, bright woman, despite appearing to be in her 90s, and will slap any PCs round the head with a ladle if they give her any cheek.

Scene 2 – Intermission 1

If defeated, they are taken, tied up and left in the basement of the chop shop in Yaumetei on the Kowloon mainland – they can use a sequence of skills to escape

If not, they need to track their attackers to the warehouse. Police, Detective, or magical skills can do this – they need to each make a roll to conclude their investigations, to determine how the next scene starts.

Scene 3 – Throwdown at the Chop Shop

The Chop Shop is on two levels, with a mezzanine floor between it. Various parts of half-deconstructed cars, helicopters, and weirder artifacts can be seen around the site, and overall-clad humans (apes in human suits) wander around the mezzanine. Depending on their successes previously, they may have the jump on them! Note that Autumn Flute and his priests have already fled with their prize.

Foe	S1	S2	S3
A-A Macaque	9	7	8
B-B Baboon	12	12	7
Mooks	6	10	8

8 Overall-Clad Gorilla Mechanics (mooks)

Martial Arts 8 / Def 13 / Speed 5 / Damage 9 (Spanner)

Ack-Ack Macaque, without his chopper (FF)

Martial Arts 12 / Def 12 / Tou 6 / Spd 6 / Thrown Tires 10

Helix Rebreather – spend 5 shots, until the next keyframe, and named combatant who makes a failed attack takes 5 wound points

Once impaired, will attempt to flee

Sunglasses, brightly coloured macaque face, cackles

Boom-Boom Baboon, without his chopper (FF)

Guns 12 / Def 12 / You 6 / Spd 6 / Shotgun / SMG / Pistols 10

Blam Blam Epigram – add 1 to shot cost and make a pithy remark, DV is +2 or +8 vs an Impaired opponent

Once impaired, will attempt to flee

Flight cap, headphones, silent

Once the smoke has cleared, they can see a portal open up – and the screech of car tires – as they have already taken Nana Lo into the Netherworld

Scene 4 – Montage

As they climb into their mis-matched vehicles (allow the PCs to narrate what vehicles they are riding), they can track the Darkness Pagoda villains through the netherworld – run this as a 13th Age Montage, except vehicular!

Scene 5 – At the Foot Of The Darkness Pagoda

At the base of the Darkness Pagoda, a weird aztec-style step pyramid, they can see Nana Lo, tied to an altar with a bubbling pool of noodle soup in front of her. Autumn Flute stands in front of them, heavily made-up face wielding a sacrificial knife – Yes, soon you yourself will be – like the noodles – knife-cut! Then we will feast on your magical flesh!

Amidst the gloom, strange creatures and beings flare – it’s time for the showdown!

Foe	S1	S2	S3	S4
Autumn Flute	14	10	10	14
M Viol	9	8	12	9
Lord Jaguar	12	11	8	9
D Gorilla	7	7	8	7
Gorilla Mook	11	7	6	6
Monk Mook	6	9	11	9

Autumn Flute, priest of Darkness Pagoda (Boss)

Sorcery 16 / Def 15 / Tou 7 / Spd 8 / Tendrils of darkness 13

Back to the Wall – if attacked by more than 1 character, shot cost to attack is 2

Anti-Tech – +1 Def vs Guns, Mutant and Scroungetech attacks

Teleport – can move to ranged distance instantly

Midnight Viol, Darkness Pagoda Sub-Priest (FF)

Sorcery 13 / Def 13 / Tou 5 / Spd 7 / Tendrils of darkness 10

Teleport – can move to ranged distance instantly

Constantly taunts the heroes with clues as to their plan – “soon the netherworld will know of our power, with the aid of our ape-friends”

Lord Jaguar, chief bodyguard of Autumn Flute (FF)

Martial Arts 13 / Def 12 / Tou 6 / Spd 6 / Sword 10

Toxic Dart – when downed, make a 0-shot interrupt action; ten minutes after the fight ends, make a Constitution check of suffer 15 Wound Points

Darkness Gorilla (FF)

Creature Powers 13 / Def 12 / Tou 6 / Spd 5 / Claws 10

Energy Drain – +2 to attack if anyone who spent a Fortune point since last attack

8 Confused Overall-Clad Gorilla Mechanics (mooks)

Martial Arts 8 / Def 13 / Speed 5 / Damage 9 (Spanner)

8 Devoted Faithful of the Darkness Pagoda (mooks)

Martial Arts 8 / Def 13 / Speed 5 / Damage 9 (Sacrificial Knife)

Once the enemies are defeated, you can feel the gloom lift from this place – the Darkness Pagoda is crumbling, and they must escape with Nana Lo. Describe a quick scene where they chase back through the obstacles they introduced earlier, and end with the Feng Shui restored and an epilogue of everyone eating some delicious noodles at Nana Lo’s.